What is Gender Afterall?
Ok, I’m in this Sexual and Gender Diversity class, and I consider myself to be a fairly open-minded, accepting type of person. However, I am having trouble wrapping my mind around this transgendered business.
I understand feeling like you were born the wrong gender. Kind of. But what is gender? Are there really only male and female? Does being male really mean being masculine and if you are a woman do you have to play with dolls as a child and want long feminine hair? I guess my real issue is that when a person feels they are the wrong gender, gender becomes so black and white and stereotyped. Why does being a man (physically or psychologically) mean you favor a masculine appearance and are interested in sports and are career-oriented?
My other huge issue: Sex Confirmation Surgery. Why would anyone ever want to, essentially, mutilate their genitalia to ‘confirm’ their gender? If gender is more about what is between your ears than what’s between your legs (as activists and promoters chant endlessly) why should you change the latter? If your physical sex isn’t important why would you undergo an expensive, dangerous medical procedure to alter it?
If the goal is getting the acknowledgement of your preferred gender, why are we not lobbying to make gender identity a choice, instead of an assumed state? Why do transgendered persons feel uncomfortable with their bodies if your body isn’t who you are? At the end of the day aren’t they just trying to make their body conform to their idea of gender? To me it seems like the exact opposite of the idea that gender is a mental state.
I have seen so much unhappiness in the teen-angst, females in America way- girls hating their bodies. They have eating disorders or cut themselves or hide themselves because they don’t look like they think a woman should (aka like a supermodel). But these women are beautiful just as they are, and we don’t tell them to have surgery so their body matches what their mind tells them is right, we tell them to learn to love their bodies. How is this different from a transgendered person? Can they not learn to love their body? Is there no chance of seeing a penis as a body part and not a label?
I can be on board (mostly) for hormone therapy- have your most superficial appearance portray the gender you want to be perceived as. I dye my hair and wear ungodly amounts of eyeliner. Sometimes I wear a corset and I’m never without high heels. This is how I see myself, its an image I’m happy with. But the fact that I feel happier with my waist cinched a bit doesn’t mean I need to have some ribs removed or go on a diet. What is under all the clothes and makeup is something I have learned to love, and I’d hope everyone could feel that way.
In the most idealistic fashion- Can’t we teach people that being physically male or female shouldn’t dictate the femininity or masculinity we project, and similarly, the gender we present is unrelated to the interests and actions of an individual. Playing with Barbie doesn’t make you a girl, and neither does wearing a skirt or having breasts.
I think I hate the idea of gender. Its stupid. Labels divide us. Its like race or religion. Giving it a name makes it something people can hate or misconstrue. Because people suck and they love to ruin things that ought to be simple and harmless.
I understand feeling like you were born the wrong gender. Kind of. But what is gender? Are there really only male and female? Does being male really mean being masculine and if you are a woman do you have to play with dolls as a child and want long feminine hair? I guess my real issue is that when a person feels they are the wrong gender, gender becomes so black and white and stereotyped. Why does being a man (physically or psychologically) mean you favor a masculine appearance and are interested in sports and are career-oriented?
My other huge issue: Sex Confirmation Surgery. Why would anyone ever want to, essentially, mutilate their genitalia to ‘confirm’ their gender? If gender is more about what is between your ears than what’s between your legs (as activists and promoters chant endlessly) why should you change the latter? If your physical sex isn’t important why would you undergo an expensive, dangerous medical procedure to alter it?
If the goal is getting the acknowledgement of your preferred gender, why are we not lobbying to make gender identity a choice, instead of an assumed state? Why do transgendered persons feel uncomfortable with their bodies if your body isn’t who you are? At the end of the day aren’t they just trying to make their body conform to their idea of gender? To me it seems like the exact opposite of the idea that gender is a mental state.
I have seen so much unhappiness in the teen-angst, females in America way- girls hating their bodies. They have eating disorders or cut themselves or hide themselves because they don’t look like they think a woman should (aka like a supermodel). But these women are beautiful just as they are, and we don’t tell them to have surgery so their body matches what their mind tells them is right, we tell them to learn to love their bodies. How is this different from a transgendered person? Can they not learn to love their body? Is there no chance of seeing a penis as a body part and not a label?
I can be on board (mostly) for hormone therapy- have your most superficial appearance portray the gender you want to be perceived as. I dye my hair and wear ungodly amounts of eyeliner. Sometimes I wear a corset and I’m never without high heels. This is how I see myself, its an image I’m happy with. But the fact that I feel happier with my waist cinched a bit doesn’t mean I need to have some ribs removed or go on a diet. What is under all the clothes and makeup is something I have learned to love, and I’d hope everyone could feel that way.
In the most idealistic fashion- Can’t we teach people that being physically male or female shouldn’t dictate the femininity or masculinity we project, and similarly, the gender we present is unrelated to the interests and actions of an individual. Playing with Barbie doesn’t make you a girl, and neither does wearing a skirt or having breasts.
I think I hate the idea of gender. Its stupid. Labels divide us. Its like race or religion. Giving it a name makes it something people can hate or misconstrue. Because people suck and they love to ruin things that ought to be simple and harmless.
posted by Abby-Wan Kenobi at 12:00 AM
1 Comments:
(and now my thoughts on the matter)
People are different for a reason and that is ok. I really don't like the idea of all this "blurring" mentality because it seems to be able invalidating traditional values. If you are a girl and don't like dolls or whatever girl things than that is fine. but you're still a girl. unpopular as it may seem, i think that the gender disorder is a mental condition (like alcoholism) that can be given into or overcome. Just because i "feel" like i should do or be something does not make it a respectable thing to do.
now suposidly these things should be promoted/accepted because they "don't hurt anyone" but that is the same bull shit arguement that is used to say that models and obsession with bodies in the media doesnt hurt little girls. you may not be able to point a finger at one person, but the social ideals that are promoted screw people up.
now if you are a girl and want to pretend you're a dude, then that is your call. ill treat you with the same human respect that i treat any stranger with. but i think its rediculous that just because you want to do/act your outragous way that i should have to bend over and kiss your ass as if your "lifestyle choices" are normal. a man mutilating his genetals to look like a woman is a mental disorder. as a man, i am amply qualified to make the claim that no man in his right mind wants to lose his equipment.
if we are suposed to treat mental problems like they are "diversity issues" than understand that i respect your right to PERSONALLY live how you choose, but i will fight your organization/media/whatever until they stop screwing up more and more people to believe that whatever urges that we have should automatically become our defining characteristic.
(as a sidenote this is not dirrected at anyone in particular and is my opinion. i welcome other thoughts and arguements and am happy to politely discuss most/any social topics)
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